After 2 years of working too much and feeling constantly stressed in my job, I knew I needed something to break the destructive habits that had crept into my life. The long hours and lack of exercise were affecting my health and happiness. I needed something to soothe a weary soul. What I didn’t know I needed was a lesson from horse on boundaries.
As I scrolled through different retreat options, I stumbled upon Thrive Farm. It immediately caught my attention since I love animals and had always wanted to try equine therapy. As I read Susan Mitchell’s story of how Thrive Farm came to be I knew I had to reach out and discover more about her and her farm. Susan and I connected immediately, her warm and inviting demeanor over the phone was so very calming. I started to feel hopeful and excited about my journey to the farm. I went to my husband, who is also my dearest friend and confidant and told him that I wanted to go to this retreat for a few days. He, as always, was very supportive of my decision to do something positive for myself.
I reached out to Susan and we scheduled my trip. She began immediately setting me up for success, she sent me “homework” to do which helped identify my goals for the stay. She set up a fantastic itinerary and incredible menu. Yes, in addition to being a fantastic human being, life coach, and critter whisperer extraordinaire, she is a brilliant cook. I gained so much from my stay at the farm, including a bit of weight….
As I wound my way up the roads into the mountains, I felt the pressures of corporate life start to dissipate and allowed myself to relax and remember what it was like to feel good. As I drove past the farm house and up to the charming cabin that was to be my home for next few days, I knew I had made a good decision.
I was introduced to the animals on the farm – the dogs were the initial greeting committee and take their job very seriously. They were a constant source of love and entertainment during my stay. The goats were so adorable and funny and with names like Moonpie and Starbucks, how could you not love them.
The horses were majestic, funny and so intelligent. The patriarch, J.W., is 33 years old and has the most gentle and kind way about him. Lola is a black and white beauty who is a bit skittish, so I was so very happy when she finally got comfortable with my presence. Honey Mabel is a miniature but in size only. She has the biggest personality of all the horses and is a force to be reckoned with when she is in a “mood.” Colton is just..well Colton and no one is going to get anything over on him….
The horse that was gracious enough to let me work with her was Sienna. She is a chestnut and white beauty exuding grace and power, yet also incredibly gentle and patient. Her eyes were deep and soulful, and I immediately felt a connection with her. As I spent more time with her, I began to notice something interesting – Sienna had impeccable boundaries.
I was given what should have been a very simple task… it was to put a halter on a horse. So I had to figure out how it worked and get it on this rather large animal who probably didn’t want a harness on its head. For those of you who know me, figuring out how things work and directions and puzzles… well, just are not my thing. This is where JW gets props. He tried his best to show this “stupid human” how to put a harness on. He even bent his head down and let me try until he finally gave up on me and walked off. I was however finally successful and was ready to harness Sienna.
As I approached Sienna, she turned her back on me. It stopped me cold in my tracks. She had been so friendly before. This happened again, so I stopped and took stock of myself. My purposeful and determined stride was very off putting to her. I was coming at her to do something to her. The better approach was to go to her and do something with her. I needed to “slow my roll” so to speak. I took a few deep breaths, grounded my energy and tried again. She could feel the shift in me and now I was asking her and not demanding of her. Sienna was very clear in her communication to me when I was crossing her limits. She did so in a subtle yet firm and elegant manner. The rest of my time with Sienna was very healing and powerful for me.
I learned that it’s ok to ask people to respect my boundaries and it’s ok to choose not to interact with people who are not in a healthy place. I have taken my lessons learned from this amazing being and am building my “gracious boundaries.”